Pregnancy : happiness or.......

I begin my last month of pregnancy.
I saw so many couples trying to have children and facing the huge sadness of miscarriage or infertility or new born death...
I feel lucky to be able to become pregnant without any problems, to have a pregnancy without big problems and to be able to imagine my future family without worries. Even if I know everyday is precious and must be appreciate fully, I can empathise and imagine the worth...
I am nearly to meet my baby boy but I am not that excited or haapy. I feel like it is a normal thing for me. So I feel a bit ashamed to have this feeling toward those who don't have that chance.
Pregnancy and giving birth must be  beautiful memories and feelings but unfortunatly it is not always like that  some kind of ideas or psychological states can interfere and make things more difficult.
I hope everything would be alright, I hope my children could live in this world and help improving it since I wasn't able to do so (or maybe not yet), I hope my children to be better that I am, find their happiness and make the one they love happy too!